Saturday, October 16, 2010

Eventually, I learn

I basically have one living relative. She is 88. She said something that irritated me the other day. When I hung up the phone, after having the good sense to not say anything, I fumed around for a moment or to.

Then I paused, and I thought -- when she dies, I will even miss moments like this. And I will feel how petty it was to get irritated in the first place.

So I decided to thank God that she irritated me, that I love her enough that I let her get under my skin. I thanked God that she and I have an emotional relationship.

I'm lucky to have her. I probably grate against her nerves on occasion, but she learned her lessons more quickly than I have, I think.

So, I choose to not be irritated. I choose to be thankful that she is in my life, and to celebrate ALL the moments we have left together. They are precious in ways one only realizes when one is near the visible end of them.

Now, make no mistake, I hope she lives a much longer life -- but at 88 one starts being aware of the finite. She is near the end of her life's ledger, but what is true for us now, is really true for everyone -- we can choose what we feel. In common everyday moments we can select gratitude as a reasonable choice. It feels so much better. And in the end, it is so much more deeply true.

5 Comments:

Blogger Linnea said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

6:14 AM  
Blogger Linnea said...

Lovely posting! You're blog is the greatest:)

6:15 AM  
OpenID Barbara Shallue said...

Beautifully said - such a great reminder (and one I needed right now! Thank you!)

12:07 PM  
Anonymous An Authentic Life said...

Over from An Authentic Life, your "BlogHer" sister.

Lovely post.

TY

KT

12:11 PM  
Blogger Linnea said...

Would it be permissible to copy this post over to my blog with a link to yours and a very clear tag telling where it came from? It is an important read. There's already a link, but the text is, well, important.

1:27 PM  

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